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Sister and The Dominecker Hen

Published by Tulan in Satire
May 12th, 2011

(This is another sister eposide for purpleslinky.)
Y’all know Sister. She is the contrariest girl on the mountain. She will give you tit for tat every time. Honey, it’s like stirring a hornets nest with a stick. Just don’t ever think about tangling with Sister. You can’t knock the wind out of her sails. Of course, she is my sister and beggars can’t be choosers. So I just do the best I can.

I tell you child, I don’t know what I’m going to do with Sister. She’s got the smartest mouth you ever saw on a woman. Why she would just as leave to cuss you out as kick a cat. I walked up the trail to her house this morning and I could hear her carrying on before I got in sight of the house. That girl is a hard headed and a half if I do have to say so about my own Sister. Well, I got on up there where I could see what she was carrying on about and I’ll be dad blamed if she wasn’t out in the hen house cussin the chickens.

Sister’s House

Now don’t that beat all? Like any bird brain wouldn’t have nothing better to do than to cuss the chickens. I said to Sister, Shut up Sister, folks can hear you all over the mountain. Sister said to me, Sister I don’t want to hear none of your mouthing off,  sneaking up on me like that, you have cut me to the quick, and I didn’t ask for your two cents worth anyway. Well, I knowed to shut up my mouth. When Sister gets crossways you can’t do one thing with her. That old girl is  grittier than a chicken gizzard. I’ll say that and not tell a lie.

I could see right off that Sister was trying to get eggs out from under that old dominecker hen of hers and that old hen wasn’t having none of it. She was puffin up and flogging the stuffins out of Sister every time she tried to stick her hand under there. That old hen was wantin some little chicks bad. She wasn’t having nothing to do with Sister stealing her eggs. I thought for sure Sister was gonna drag that old hen off the nest and have chicken and dumplings for supper.

I said, Sister let’s go in the house and leave that old hen alone. She’s gonna get hungry and leave that nest after a while, then we can high tail it out here and get them eggs. Child, Sister likes a fight to the finish, she don’t like to loose especially to an old dominecker hen, but Sister had had enough flogging for one time. I had a sneaking idea Sister would send Guthrie out to do the dirty work when he got home.

Sister said, what’re you doing up here this time of day anyway? I’d a thought you’d be working that garden of yours. I passed there yesterday and I could see them weeds sprouting up all around your beans and tomaters. Why ain’t you out there cleaning them out. I said, Sister, can’t I take time to visit my own sister without getting rared out? You are hurting my feelings, and honey, she really was. I just felt like crying my eyes plum out. Sister cut her eyes at me and I could see the old devil twinkling in them, and honey, we both got so tickled we nearly laughed our heads off. You can’t never tell if sister is on her high horse or if she’s funnin you.

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More Sister articles by Tulan:

http://authspot.com/thoughts/sister-and-the-preacher/

http://purpleslinky.com/humor/picking-up-hickory-nuts/

http://gomestic.com/family/aunt-almers-house/

http://authspot.com/thoughts/me-and-sister-go-to-town/

http://purpleslinky.com/offbeat,sister-would-whip-some-tail/

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4 Comments
  1. Posted May 12, 2011 at 2:17 pm

    I like this post.
    Interesting share.
    Please visit:

    http://socyberty.com/issues/in-40-minutes-it-fell-ger/

    Thank you

  2. Posted May 12, 2011 at 8:00 pm

    i like this

  3. Posted May 12, 2011 at 8:07 pm

    Tulan, I enjoyed reading your story so much. You gave me a good laugh when I needed it bad. You should get all your sister stories together and publish them. I know they would sell. Don’t stop writing them. We dearly need something to laugh at.

  4. Posted May 15, 2011 at 2:22 pm

    Cheers for this one a fun read

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