A Baby’s View of Life

Published by in Humor
9th Apr 2010

Well….it all started when I was born.  I didn’t know what happened.  I was just happily playing along in my mothers stomach when KAZAM.  I was hit with this thing called air it was so terrifyingly weird I started crying really bad (I think all babies do it though).  So now it’s been 3 weeks since I was hit with air, and I seem to like it now that I have gotten used to it.  Its so exciting out of my mothers stomach, so many people are making these weird sounds like ” Honey I’ve got to go to work now” I mean who talks to honey? Second of all all, these people are feeding me this gushy gross stuff “vegetables” they call it.  Thirdly, nobody ever takes me seriously.  Like this one time this lady came right up to me (like literally 2 centimeters away from my face ) and started going ” whos da lidle baby ooo that cute lidle baby oooooo he”s so cute sosososo cute” with her lips all puckered up.  It was seriously really super scary i started crying.  well i tried to stop myself, but i think its like our natural instinct our something.  All these tall people think they caring for me but all they are doing is making me puke with vegetable has anyone told you why babies cry? Because there stomach hurts from vegetables.  In about 3 more weeks I’m sitting in this cool high chair that makes me feel like a king.  But the only problem is, is that when you want to get down they don’t let you down.  So now you know why babies always spill there food when there sitting in a high chair.  Here is another one, why do they want to potty train you?  As far as I’m concerned wear a diaper until your 80 I mean, hey what’s the problem?  Oops am I leaving a big stink around? Deal with it!  Plus when big sisters and brothers are all I hate you! You ruined my life!! I mean it wasn’t my fault I was born, I rather be in your position seriously!!!! I hate being a baby!

Baby’s Opinion: Hates Life