A Few Jokes My Boyfriend Doesn’t Want to Hear Again

Published by in Humor
4th Apr 2011

A math major, a bio major, and an engineering major were in chem lab when their experiments caught fire.  The engineering major built an elaborate contraption with a lot of tubes and pipes and a pulley to put the fire out from across the room.  The bio major put the experiment in the sink and ran water on it until the fire went out.  The math major said, “Aha!  A solution exists!”

Three statisticians went duck hunting.  One of them shot a foot high.  The second one shot a foot low.  The third one excitedly yelled, “We got it!”

An infinite number of mathematicians walked into a bar.  The first one said, “I’ll have a beer.”  The second one said, “I’ll have half a beer.”  The third one said, “I’ll have a quarter of a beer.”  And so on; they just kept coming.  The bartender said, “You’re a bunch of idiots,” and poured two beers.

Why can’t anyone convince objects with constant radius that they’re wrong about anything?  Because they rely on their own circular logic.

Read more in HumorThe Funny Dialogues Part 32 »

A mathematician threw some hot coals in the garbage and left his coffee maker on one night.  The hot coals set his garbage on fire and his smoke detector went off.  He got out of bed, put the fire out, and went back to sleep.  Then, his coffee maker caught fire, and his smoke detector went off again.  He got out of bed, threw the coffee maker in the garbage, and went back to sleep knowing that he’d reduced the problem to one he’d already solved.

Why didn’t any one want to party with the equilateral rectangle?  Because it was such a square.