Amusing Chinese Fortune Cookie Sayings

Published by in Humor
23rd Mar 2010

Time for another visit to the land of the fortune cookie kingdom.  Let’s see what wisdom you can unlock today.

1.   Never sign a declaration of constipation.  It’s too much of a strain.

2.   The first words out of a baby’s mouth are not Lady Ga Ga.

3.   When your computer is down, it is a sure sign of depression.

4.   If your looks are paper thin, be prepared to be blown away.

5.   Destiny smiles on you.  Don’t let your wife know about your affair with her.

6.   The path you take leads you to a long line in the unemployment office.

7.   Pick up your pants on the ground or be prepared for a visit from the pants in blue.

8.   You are about to meet your dreamboat.  Just call him the SS Disaster.

9.   A sharpened pencil will not lead to a sharpened mind.

10. Your mind is like a television.  There is too much clutter and fluff.  Also, you are far too remote to relate to others.

  • 8Shei8

    Another delightful read!

  • Linley Alexander

    Very funny. I like #5 :D

  • Darla Smith

    Great sayings!