Batsquatch is Hard to Spell The Same Way Twice

Published by in Humor
9th Jun 2013

Batsquatch

The 80’s gave us tacky clothing, hit or miss music, and hair styles that caused us all to bury our photo albums in the back yard. It also gave us Batsquatch.

What, you have never heard of a Batsquatch? Well set back and let me tell you the tale of a legendary creature so silly, so unbelievable, it could have only come from the 80’s.

 On a Sunday May 18th 1980 Mt. St. Helens erupted. Soon after people living around the volcano began to report sightings of a large creature. It stood on two legs like a man, had large leather wings, a head like a bad with large red eyes. They named it Batsquatch.

Did this creature escape hell when the volcano erupted?  Flying from its molten prison, it’s winged from cloaked in sparks and smoke? Or could a bat and Bigfoot have consummated a relationship the world just isn’t ready to except? And leaving a mutated child at a constant reminder of their forbidden affair?

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Or is it all just a bunch of exaggerations and lies perpetrated by people jumping at shadows or simply fishing for attention?

For the sake of comedy I’m going to go with the Bigfoot bat late night hookup.  Seriously! Just picture that in your mind and tell me it doesn’t make you laugh just a little. If it doesn’t also play the theme to the 1960’s Batman T.V show, but replace the word Batman with Batsquatch and if you’re not on the floor laughing then you need help.

Now comedy aside there are not an over abundance of credible witnesses who  have ever seen a Batsquatch. He has however been given credit for cattle disappearances and mutilations.

Farmers from all around Mt. St. Helens have upon seeing the mutilated copse of a prize winning cow have been known to thrust their fists in to the air and let out the plaintiff cry “Batsquatch!!!!!”. Because that makes allot more sense than the possibility of humans, or non mythological animals destroying their live stock.

But let’s be honest, would screaming “coyote!!!!!”  And thrusting your fist in to the sky be as dramatic? I think we all know it wouldn’t.

Now this is going to be a short article. In truth I couldn’t find much information that was worth retelling regarding the Batsquatch.

So why did I bother to write about it in the first place? Just so I can use the word “Batsquatch” over and over.

Thanks for reading about the Batsquatch. ,

Tim Clemons