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Changing the Internet is One Click Away
Join my movement to do away with end user license agreements. Never worry about signing up for websites or downloading software again.
End user license agreements are just plain stupid. Why can’t these agreements be simplified? At the end of this article you can click them away forever.
This is change we need!
For example: Subject to the terms of this Agreement, ABC Company hereby grants you a limited, personal, non-commercial, non-exclusive, non-sublicensable, non-assignable, free -of -charge license to download, install and use the Client Software on your computer.
You will not undertake, cause, permit or authorize the modification, creation of derivative works, translation, reverse engineering, decompiling, disassembling or hacking of the Client or any part thereof.
I mean, give me a break! I don’t even know what “non-sublicensable” means. If I wanted to reverse engineer something, it would be end user license agreements. But they won’t let me!
Okay, get ready, changing the Internet is one click away.
People don’t read these agreements! We are all liars!
Until further notice: this article is non-transferable, non-binding, non-intelligible, non-readable, and non-existing. You have the right to chew it, swallow it, regurgitate it, pass it on. Beware: antacids and bypass surgery are significant side effects.
I hope I don’t get sued for writing this article. If I do get sued, I plan for it to be assignable to someone else. I will feel disassembled but I won’t allow myself to be hacked off.
Here we go. Click on this link to support my new movement: www.finishoffenduserlicenseagreementsforever.org
Oops, sorry, when I tried to register my movement they wanted me to sign an end user license agreement. I couldn’t do it. Maybe next time.
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16 Comments
Ha! Ha! He! He! I like this article, and I wish we didn’t have to copy and type in codes that they don’t want us to read. Lots of time the words are stratch out or written funny. Then you can click on the audio to hear the letters spoken. I hear nothing but funny language and noise. You’re right. Some things make no sense.
Gail, its driving me crazy! I know it is important to somebody, but the legalize is mind-boggling.
End user agreements usually contain rights for them to pass on our etc.,.
So why should we sign or agree. We should have more rights.
That’s part of the problem. We do have rights but how do we sift through those agreements, privacy policies, and terms of use? They are long, voracious, and written in point 2 font!
This is so funny and oh so true. I hate policy and I hate reading about it.
Lauren, you said it.
Funny article, but so true. Licensing agreements are actually contracts and any and all contracts should be carefully studied by a lawyer, before entering in to the agreement and children under the age of 18, cannot legally enter into a contract without first having a legal aged parent or guardian given their permission. I have a little experience with licensing agreements that stems from my more than 20 years in the toy and game industry.
God Bless You,
Nelson Doyle
Nelson, thanks for your experience-based input. Brian
When you sort through the jumble of mumbo-jumbo on your application fo rthat new website, drop me a line. I’ll sign up.
You have a great sense of humor, and I agree with Schaller!
Schaller and Eden, will do!!
I don’t think you will get sued, but a change is needed..
Nice article, and I totally agree!
Interesting article and so very true.
BC, lindalulu, and Darla, thanks so much for reading and commenting. Brian
Good article. Enjoyed your humor. This is your New Years read forward.
Take care, Pam