Concussion Corner – The Truth

“It really all happened by accident,” says veteran producer, Hymie Nose.  He is reminiscing, in his retirement home, about the chat show that was in the 1960s, one of the most successful TV programs on the air, Concussion Corner.

“We were producing the Barry Marr Show,” he continues, “which had a small but loyal following for Barry’s gentle interviews with lesser Hollywood stars and popular celebrities of the day. That night the main guest was Gloria Swansong and everything was going fine till Barry asked her if she enjoyed eating deep-fried fruit-bats.”

What Hymie didn’t know was that, as the studios were being redeveloped at the time, a lot of construction equipment was left lying around.  Barry had walked into a steel support bar in the car park when he arrived and as he hadn’t been cut or anything he hadn’t reported it.  What he didn’t realise was that he’d suffered a concussion which had knocked some of his brain cells awry.

Hymie continues his story.  “Well, we all knew something wasn’t right but we had nothing to cut to apart from a continuity guy and I’ve always been a great believer in the show-biz adage that ‘the show must go on’.  I also realised that we were getting laughs from the audience, so I thought ‘the hell with it, let’s see where this goes’.  Anyway, Gloria says, “Barry, you know you don’t deep-fry fruit-bats, you sauté them lightly in a little butter.  I like to add a little garlic and sprinkle some parmesan over them once they’re cooked. Gloria was going a bit ga-ga by that time, but she kept the game rolling and the audience were roaring.”

The rest, as they say, is history.  Word of Concussion Corner soon spread and Barry, even though his original concussion had passed, frequently interviewed in the guise of Napoleon or Florence Nightingale.  The guests were encouraged to let fly with flights of fancy too but as many weren’t adept at this form of improvising ad-libs ratings began to fall.

“We were in a bind,” explains Hymie and that’s when I came up with the idea of concussing the host and the guests before the show, so we’d get the maximum amount of genuine insanity possible.  I had a padded mallet constructed by the props department and Barry and his guests would get a blow to the head just before transmission time.  I didn’t hide the fact and even re-named the show as Concussion Corner, but I just knew we’d have a hit on our hands.  Some of the guests were a bit dubious about getting  a whack on the head, but even the most sober-minded could see that they get away with saying anything if they were concussed and they desperately wanted that freedom.”

The show ended on the night actor Hector Macho went berserk and injured three cameramen and a make-up girl.

“He was a pussy,” says Hymie, “I hardly gave him a tap with the mallet and he went wild.  That make-up girl gave him a hell of a fight though.  Went on to be a professional wrestler.  Great days.”