I hate cooked spinach. I know that it is nutritious, but I can’t stand to eat it. I’ll tolerate raw spinach in my salad, but that’s about it. Here are ten things that I would like to do with cooked spinach:

1. Send it over by boat to Popeye. At least he’ll appreciate it.
2. Use the cooked spinach to do finger painting. Don’t expect me to lick my fingers though.
3. Feed it to my dog. I just hope that Bowser doesn’t take a bite out of my leg.
4. Donate it to charity. I’m sure that it will probably be rejected.
5. Take it out to the backyard and bury it. Perhaps it will make the flowers grow better.
6. Offer it to my next-door neighbor. I haven’t been on good terms with my next-door neighbor ever since he accidentally knocked over my mailbox. This will be my way of saying, “Let’s make up and be friends.” His interpretation may be different.
7. Give out some big helpings to my poker buddies. After they have one bite of the spinach, they will soon become my ex-buddies.
8. Offer it to NASA. Let them send it into outer space. Who knows? Perhaps a space alien will actually like this food. Otherwise, Earth is in big trouble.
9. Bring it to work. Offer it to my co-workers. I’m sure that this will go over real well. Afterwards, I have no doubt that my boss will gleefully call me into his office.
10. Actually eat it. When I get totally sick, I’ll be able to call into work and stay home for a week. My stomach may need to be pumped out, however.