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Twenty Sensual and Not-So-Sensual Fortune Cookies
You’ve opened a lot of fortune cookies in your time. Many sayings are wise and thoughtful. Other sayings are very optimistic and hopeful. Here are twenty fortune cookies that are both sensual as well as not so sensual in nature.
- Be careful when kissing your boyfriend if you both have braces
- Candlelight may be romantic but the soot the next day is terrible
- Sometimes you need to be a wolf instead of a chicken
- It is better to sweep her off her feet than to be swept out the door
- Sex is like hockey, the more you score the better you feel
- A false love is like a crystal glass, easily breakable
- Your secret affair is about to be exposed. Prepare for doomsday.
- A hug from your spouse feels much better than a hug from your mother-in-law
- When your lover feels like a cold house, you need to turn up the heat
- Dating is like walking on a bed of hot coals sometimes you get burned
- Love for you is like a roller coaster; it has its ups and downs
- Love for you is like a trampoline; it has its ups and downs
- Love for you is like the bottom of the ocean; it just has its downs
- Your love life is in a funk because you smell like a skunk
- There is a future Mrs. Right in your life. You must first divorce Mrs. Wrong.
- Tonight you shall sleep on the couch. You’ve forgotten your anniversary.
- When you’ve turned off the faucet of love, you’ve also turned off the faucet of life
- Dark chocolates and a bouquet of flowers will kindle a romantic evening for hours
- Milk Duds and a handful of artificial flowers will get you a one-way ticket to the Phantom Zone
- If you sing a romantic tune off key, expect the key to your date’s bedroom to remain locked
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absolutely hilarious!
absolutely hilarious!