You’re a new patient of Dr. Ralph Summers. Dr. Summers is a dentist. From time to time, his nerves become a little frayed. Here are ten things that you should not say to a nervous dentist:

1. Why are you shaking while holding the drill. Are you planning to break out and dance.?
2. How many of your patients ever had a normal mouth again?
3. You said I have five cavities. You also said I need to have a root canal. Why are you asking me to buy some girl scout cookies at this time?
4. Do you have anything for the pain? I think I’m going to vomit. Do you mind if I vomit in the chair?
5. Why are you constantly scratching your head? Do you have a dandruff problem?
6. How can I have a baby tooth in my mouth? I’m fifty-five years old. What’s next? Do you plan to put me into diapers?
7. Is that a real diploma on the wall or is it a fake?
8. What ado you mean my gums are all red? I’m not a vampire. I don’t suck blood.
9. Are you keeping up-to-date? I see that you still have a calendar from 1955 on the wall.
10. Why did your patient in the other room scream his head off?

Image by kencf0618 via Flickr