Commercials.  We’re bombarded with them—dozens?  Hundreds?—all day, every day.  Usually, while watching television, I keep the remote close.  I figure skipping through channels during ads is a lot more fun than having someone yell at me about how cheap his tweeters are.  But sometimes, a commercial makes me stop and take notice.

For instance, some of us are still living who can remember the Coke commercial that took the country by storm.  It became an anthem of the times.  “I’d like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony…” with people standing in a huge circle, holding hands.  That was just before my pet dinosaur stepped on my old t.v. set.

The commercial that has caught my eye—or ear—lately is one where everyone is “singing” one note.    A lot of words, with the scenery and people changing constantly, but only one note.  I don’t know what they’re selling because it’s too irritating to listen to through the whole thing.  But it is catchy—in its own way.

However, I’d have to say the commercial that gets the Most Ridiculous Award is the telephone commercial.  I know, there are a lot of phone commercials.  But in this one, they say, if you would like to have telephone service, or if your service has been shut off, call us.

I beg your pardon?

And how should I do that, pray tell?

Should I get out the ol’ bull horn?  Maybe I’m supposed to stand on a street corner and holler?  Perhaps they want smoke signals.  Hmm…that presents a problem, since yard burning is illegal in my city.

I have a phone, but I figured I would try contacting this phone company via the internet.  The  “contact us” place refuses—yes, flat-out refuses—to supply customer service over the internet.  They said they have found telephone contact to be easier. 

No kidding!  That must be why people want a telephone.

Maybe in their next commercial, they’ll explain how to call without a phone.