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Mess up your first date
Some comedy
- Past gas
- tell your date that you’re happily married
- pick up your date 2 hours late
- take your date to a place that you know they would not like
- tell them that you are an escaped prisoner
- tell them that you shit your pants
- if number six don’t work than literally shit your pants
- Tell your date too lose a few pounds
- tell your date too gain a few pounds
- tell your date you have no goals and no job
- tell them you don’t plan on getting a job
- tell them while you are at a restaurant with them that they have to pay for dinner
- Ask if they have pets
- whatever pets they do have, say you don’t like that kind of animal
- Laugh at your own jokes
- laugh after ever single sentence
- Don’t say nothing nice at all
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