‘ Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse; (Mouse noises, cheeping and hands rubbing together as if they’re running)
No, I said not even a mouse, not even one mouse. None! (Mice stop silent)
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care (Collective sigh, “Ah!)
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there; (Jumping up and down excited)
The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads; (someone twirls across the front like a ballerina)
And mamma in her kerchief, and I in my cap,
Had just settled our brains for a long winter’s nap (Man snores quietly, Woman snores like a freight train)
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter. (Woman snores louder)
Away to the window I flew-wait! (Goes over to the Woman and pinches her nose. She stops snoring)I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave a luster of midday to objects below; (Everyone looks down as if peering from a window)
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh and eight tiny reindeer (Horses naying)
I said reindeer, not horses (Everyone shrugs, looking at each other confused)
I don’t know what reindeer sound like. Maybe they moo. (Everyone moos, then mutters “Nah” and stops)
With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
And I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick. (Everyone strikes an angelic pose and sings an operatic “Ta Da!”)
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled and shouted and called them by name;
(Like roll call)“Now Dasher! (Here!)Now, Dancer! (Check!)Now, Prancer and Vixen! (Both say Right-oh! in an English accent)
On, Comet! (Gotcha!)On, Cupid! (Present!)On, Donder and Blitzen! (Aye aye, Captain!)
To the top of the porch (All eyes look up and to the right)
To the top of the wall (All eyes look higher and to the left)
Now dash away, dash away, dash away all! (Everyone starts to dash away, bumping into each other and getting hyped up, then scatter)
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,
So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,
With the sleigh full of toys,–and St. Nicholas too.
And then in a twinkling I heard on the roof (Everyone gathers back together again after scattering)
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof. (Clap, pat one leg, pat other leg, sound like galloping horses)
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney St. Nicholas came and got stuck. (Man’s voice, “Uh, little help here!”)
No, that’s not right. Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound. (Same man’s voice, “Thank you!”)
He was dressed all in fur from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot; (Everyone brushing at clothes as if brushing away soot)
A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a pedlar just opening his pack.
His eyes, how they twinkled! His dimples, how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry;
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the beard on his chin was as white as the snow.
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath.
He had a broad face and a little round belly
That shook, when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly.
He was chubby and plump,–a right jolly old elf;
And I laughed, when I saw Him, in spite of myself. (Onlookers are aggravated and say things like, “You laughed at Santa?!? I can’t believe you would laugh at Santa Claus! How dare you? What’s wrong with you?)
What? He was funny-looking. You would’ve laughed too if you’d been there. Leave me alone and let me finish my poem. Ahem…
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread. (Looks smugly at the others, who hang their heads in shame)
He spoke not a word, but went straight to work,
And filled all the stockings; then turned with a jerk,
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose. (Man’s voice, “Uh, little help here!”)
No, Santa, you didn’t get stuck in this version, remember? (Oh, yeah. Thank you!)
He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle, (Everyone whistles a call)
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle;
But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,
(Everyone in unison) HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD-NIGHT!