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Why You Will Never Win, No Matter What Child You Are
We’ve all had that discussion about being the “only” child or the “eldest” child or the “youngest” child or the “middle” child and how bad it is being one of those children. The truth is, mate, you’ll never win. (Please note, all of this is purely humorous and no offense is intended if true).
We’ve all done it. We’ve complained about ourselves or the siblings. If you don’t know what I’m on about, I am referring to the common “positions” in a family – the “eldest” child, the “youngest” child, the “middle” child and the “only” child. As children, you will remember complaining about your position in the family and about your siblings’ position in the family. But I know you’ll remember one thing, no matter what child you are, you are never at any special advantage. This is why…
1) The Eldest Child
Advantages:
The “eldest” child is the trend setter. If the “eldest” child wears a shirt with ‘I’m stupid’ written on it, the rest of the pack follows the leader. The “eldest” child is given responsibility – makes them look grown up and more mature – but really, who cares if they really are grown up or mature. The “eldest” child is ALWAYS the centre of attention. They are given the first choice, be it picking out what jumper to wear or which pair of those hideous socks you get to choose. The “eldest” child is the smart one by default because they have “seen more of life”.
Disadvantages:
The “eldest” child can get away with nothing! There’s always that sob story of “setting an example for your younger siblings” that sticks to them ALL their lives. The “eldest” child is also always under scrutiny for the best behaviour out in a party or something. Who cares if the other children dipped their chicken salad in the custard at a posh party? If the “eldest” child does it, they are bound to get a few harsh words eventually.
2) The Middle Child
Advantages:
The “middle” child is always the one who can sink into the shadows and disappear when the other kids get the blame. They are always put in a situation where they don’t have to set an example for any one or they don’t even have to follow it. The “middle” child always gets to play the angel. Let the older sibling get the blame because of what the “middle” child did to the younger one. The “middle” child is the one who is the best behaved because the others naturally expect the “middle” child to have the maturity of the older sibling and the innocence of the younger one. If there is more than one “middle” child, the “middle” child always has their own little group of “middlehood”.
Disadvantages:
The “middle” child is always the “middle” child. Overshadowed by the others. Sometimes, no one really cares about the “middle” child because let’s face it, you are far too normal to be in a family. The “middle” child is the one who is often forgotten because they can slip in and out of situations at ease so sometimes, it’s best just to not keep them in account of the grand scheme of things. Don’t scoff at this, “middle” children out there, you secretly know this is true!
3) The Youngest Child
Advantages:
The “youngest” child is the most spoilt! No one wants to hurt the “youngest” child because the “youngest” child is always the most cunning and the most angelic. The “youngest” child could do no wrong. All they have to is point the finger at the others if they have to in a sticky situation. The “youngest” child is the one who gets away with everything. They have nothing to fear because they will always have backup (the other siblings) to cover for them. And the other siblings can’t say ‘no’ because that would mean violating the “code” of siblingship. The “youngest” one is often the one who gets what he/she wants. If the “youngest” child does something wrong, the parents are always quick to say “He/She is only a child!” And when the “youngest” child is 42 and still living with their parents, the “youngest” is still “only a child”.
Disadvantages:
The “youngest” child has to follow the crowd every single time. When the “eldest” child sets an example, they are obliged to follow it. The “youngest” child is the one who can’t think for themselves, just because they aren’t allowed to. The “youngest” child is never given the first choice in anything and most of the times responsibility is never given to the “youngest” child. The “youngest” can be bullied by the others as the ‘spoilt’ one and often ostracised from the rest of the group. The “youngest” can also be compared to the others constantly and be overshadowed too.
4) The Only Child
Advantages:
The “only” child has it all. They are spoilt and loved by their parents. They are given all the freedom that they could ever want because the parents don’t want to ‘hurt’ their ‘poor little baby’. They are given the responsibility and Nan and Grandpa will always love the “only” child because he or she can carry the most divine manners. The “only” child has no one else whom they are compared to. They can think for themselves and they can act for themselves. The “only” child is given the latest iPod only by asking for it. The “only” child can get away with anything too and all they have to do is say ‘sorry’.
Disadvantages:
Secretly at school, not very many people like the “only” child because they are jealous of the latest Gucci coat that the “only” child has. The “only” child can get really bored over the summer because they have no one to play with or no one to gossip with. The “only” child is also meant to behave really well and even though they can get away with misbehaviour, it is often optimum if they have the best polished shoes on and the best neatly brushed hair. The “only” child is the sole carrier of the parents dreams and ambitions for their “only” child so the “only” child must stick to accomplishing them.
You are bound to be in one of those situations at some point in your life and you will find that if not all, at least some of it is true! So stop moaning about why you are disadvantaged as a child with your position in the family and stop whinging about why your siblings are so advantaged as a child with their position in the family and live with it! The truth of the matter is – no matter what child you are, you’ll never win!
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25 Comments
Very well prepared article and also nice and cute pictures used. Liked it!
Very interesting article.
An insightful well presented article. I was the youngest, a late-life child and the only girl. To say I was spoiled is an understatement, just ask my brothers.
Well thought of. Written with the perception of a much older person.Commendable.
Very thoughtful write. I liked the topic.
A very good article. You described my two younger brothers and me exactly. How did you know? I really enjoyed that.
Christine
Thanks all of you for your comments.
Feel free to guess what child do you lot think I am
I’ll be interested to see your guesses if I’ll be the youngest, oldest, middle or only.
I’m No.3 out of 4….and I reckon the favourite!! Sorry siblings!!! Nice piece Atikin, and I think you’re a middle child, 3 out of 4 like me!
Haha.. It made me smile. Well put!
Your an only child Atikin.. Thats how I picture you as
as for me I am eldest of with 2 younger sisters.
LOL, I love it, and I don’t want to hear any more complaining about being the first, middle, or youngest child. You have them all pegged but good. As for me I am the eldest. I have three sons so there you go. You gave each one of them a good come uppence.
like you said there are no winners:
I get stuck with the tears of my parents (im the youngest)
My brother gets in over his head in drugs cause my older siblings did them once or twice
My older siblings learned how to drive the soonest and managed to destroy several cars apeice.
This is a hoot! Thanks so much for a very enjoyable article!
I love it! While it is true that the eldest child gets all the attention and is (ehem) the smat one, the attention lasts only for a short while because the younger child gets it when he arrives in this world. LOL
typo … the “smart” one.
I really enjoyed this article very much. I’m glad I wasn’t only child. the youngest always gets away with murder & is the cutest & more spoiled. The oldest sucks in a way because the parents experiment when it comes to freedom while the middle and younger get away with so much more.
Very interesting article
Being the oldest of eight siblings,I never got favored and yes,got away with nothing.If my siblings did something,it was me that got into trouble.
I’m glad my childhood years are over so maybe I can win on ocasion as an adult.Loved the article.
mmm mm m ! How did you come up with this? I am the oldest of thirteen & can relatw to each point with clarity Being the oldest I was–leader, teacher, mentor and protector & took my position seriously still do. My siblings are adults now some are even Grandparents now. But when they are under stress I get the phone call. Sometimes growwing up I wanted to runaway from it all Im glad i did not. Because now it is so fulfilling to be the one that gets called, more and more even before Mom, they want to just let her enjoy the rest of her years.. Excellent article
What about that family with over 18 kids? O.o lol great article thumbs up!
I really enjoyed your article. My sister and I are twins and I am the younger one (by one minute).
Brought a smile to my face
hello! i am the youngest of 3 and i was too lazy to read this article! so srry! but i am known to be lazy! hahaha!
haha… im the oldest, so im always the winner! lol! good article!
It gives me new ideas when I will give another family lecture