Lil Wayne Requests Prison Furlough to Attend Jesse Jackson’s Funeral

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Rapper Lil’ Wayne has reportedly asked for a temporary leave from prison to attend the funeral of Jesse Jackson.  This from a source that wishes to remain anonymous inside Rikers Prison where the rapper is a one year sentence.  Apparently Reverend Jackson was a major influence on the life and career of Wayne Carter otherwise known as Lil Wayne. “Yeah Jesse was a great influence on my life and career” Lil Wayne said in a phone interview shortly after news of Jackson’s death broke. “Because I was like a rapper and s**t and, like Rev. Jackson was always saying words that rhymed. Know what I mean? He didn’t rap or nothin but he rapped.  Know what I mean?”  I think it is safe to say that yes we do know what he means.

“Plus like, Rev. was like, he refused to sit at the back of the bus and now like nobody has to sit at the back. No matter what color you are, you can sit at the front. That is why I don’t take the bus because I know it has to be crowded in front and I can’t sit in the back because, you know, what the Rev did and s**t.” He stated. “People don’t see how important that is, know what I mean. Because if I had to, like sit in the back of my Escalade when I drove, that would be like dangerous and s**t.” Truly wise and deep words.

Prison officials refused to comment on the request for a furlough. A call to Lil’ Wayne’s personal assistant Be Shizzy, who is sharing a cell with him due to a request granted to the rapper by Judge Willa Beyonja, did acknowledge that the rapper hoped to be able to attend. ” It is not without precedent.” B Quizzy told us. We asked Lil Wayne about the precedent and he replied “Yeah I support Obama all the way.” While on the phone we also had a chance to ask him what he thought of the William Shatner death rumors. “Well I be honest with you. I don’t go for that Harry Potter s**t, but I would do the hell out of that little red headed gurl. I would bang her like I was Spartacus or something.”

Prison officials are faced with a no win situation regarding the furlough.  If they allow him to attend then they will be bombarded with cries of favoritism.  If they refuse the request they stand to be called heartless and possibly even bigoted.  One thing is for certain, Lil Wayne really looks weird.