Since my divorce, I have done my share of the inevitable internal fretting about what it was going to be like no longer having a husband around 24/7. However, recently a wise, sympathetic friend told me to make up a starter list of some of the pros of being married versus some of those of being single, then add or subtract from it as Time and temperament suggested.

Now, far be it for me to ever discount the institution of marriage since I’ve been there more than once, it would be very hypocritical of me but as I made and adjusted my list accordingly, I have come to realize that I prefer the single life. Here is part of my list:

• He used to take out the trash (now I have to do it).
• He used to wash my car regularly (now I have to do it).
• He kept my car in working order (now I have to pay a mechanic).
• He took care of the lawn (now I either have to do it or pay someone).
• He kept leaky faucets and constructional problems at bay (now I have to pay a professional).
• Since I no longer have his razor to use, I had to break down and buy one of my own.

But

• Now I sleep peacefully because I don’t have to contend with his chainsaw snoring.
• Now I finally get a chance to kick back in the recliner and use the remote control.
• Now I finally get a chance to watch the tv programs I want to watch.
• Now I can actually use my own computer whenever I want to.
• Now I can finally eat vegetarian Lean Cuisine instead of cooking meat and potatoes.
• Now I have fewer dishes to wash.
• Now I have more room in the closet for new clothes.
• Now I have less laundry to do.

And, last but not least

• Now I don’t have to decorate around bowling trophies, fly rods, and Billy Bass fish!