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Funny Bumper Stickers
Some of the funniest bumper stickers I have seen over the years from the Uk and US.
- If you can read this your teachers didn’t fail as badly as we thought.
- I’m not racist, i hate every race equally.
- You have displeased my pet monkey.
- Its OK, I’m driving this car ironically.
- Organize against conformity.
- Avoid hangovers, stay drunk.
- Nemesis wanted, possibly crime lord or deformed megalomaniac.
- Wisecracking sidekick.
- Beware, I’m bulging with what could be muscle.
- I’m not paranoid, people really do follow me every day.
- My other car is a time machine.
- Area 51, experimental car division.
- If you can smell dead bodies you’re too close to my trunk.
- Home is where the bodies are buried.
- You should have been used for stem cell research.
- Drugs are bad m’kay
- Don’t blame me, i voted for Frankenstein.
- Get any closer and i get naked right here.
- I started out with nothing, and still have most of it left.
- Got common sense?
- You are being lied to.
- Not too close, i don’t have control of the anger problems yet
- Together we can lick testicular cancer.
- Proof evolution works both ways.
- You’re going in the wrong direction, you need to head right back where you came from.
- You aren’t from around here are you?
- They let YOU drive a car like a regular person?
- Are you receiving treatment for that mental deficiency there?
- I win by default.
- If this sign is getting smaller, don’t panic, the car in front is just moving.
- You’re proof that the drugs don’t work.
- You make a good case for Euthanasia
- The truth is out there, so stop looking in here.
- Deny everything
- Is your car to go with your arrest record and black resume?
- Don’t you have a curfew with the ankle tag?
- Shouldn’t you be concentrating on the road?
- I used to have a handle on life, but it broke off.
- Drive it like you stole it.
- I’m not an alcoholic, I’m a drunk, alcoholics go to meetings.
- Always late, but worth the wait.
- I cant dumb it down enough that you’d understand.
- Maker poverty quieter.
- Finish your beer, there’s sober people in Africa.
- I don’t take drugs any more, i don’t take them any less either.
- My anger management class really pisses me off.
- Member of PETA, people eating tasty animals.
- I like you, i shall kill you last.
- Retired, don’t ask me to do a damn thing.
- Real men wear skirts.
- Real men like cats.
- Other gods are fiction but yours is real?
- What would Tyler Durdan do?
- Whatever it was, i didn’t do it.
- I’m smiling because they didn’t find where i keep the heads.
- I’m not a qualified doctor, but ill give it a try.
- Out of the way, I’m probably running late.
- Normal people worry me.
- My kid beat up your honor student.
- I do my own stunts.
- Somewhere a village lost their idiot when you left.
- Stop laughing and reload.
- Have you seen my medication?
- Don’t like cops? next time you’re in trouble call a crack head.
- Id hate to be you, if i were me.
- I brake for gnomes.
- I pwn noobs
- My job is to comfort the disturbed, and disturb the comfortable.
- Baby Jesus cries when you don’t use your turn signal.
- The pigeons instruct me where to drive.
- Can people where you come from read yet?
- Fish tremble at the sound of my name.
- Eat right, exercise, die anyway.
- My imaginary friend thinks you have serious problems.
- Honk if you see parts fall off.
- I tried being normal once, i didn’t like it.
- Proof that crime pays.
- My invisible parrot doesn’t like you.
- Fine, I’m evolved you’re not.
- Against the laws of nature and science.
- Clear the way, i ate bad takeout last night and i could blow at any time.
- I do all my own experiments.
- Liberalism is a mental disorder.
- Red meat isn’t bad for you, fuzzy green meat is bad for you.
- Life’s a bitch, so don’t vote for one.
- I am nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore i am perfect.
- I’m still hot, it just comes in flashes now.
- I reject your reality and substitute my own.
- Honk if you’ve never seen an Uzi fired from a car window.
- Driver carries no cash, hes married.
- If god wanted to speak to you he would have made you smart.
- Jesus loves you, hes not in love with you.
- Do you follow Jesus this close?
- Get out of the way, my kid has to pee.
- Why be politically correct when you can be right?
- I say potato, you say tater.
- I brake for polar bears.
- Yes this is my truck, no i wont help you move.
- Honk if Pluto is a planet.
- Hang up and drive moron.
- I am a pirate and this is my ship.
- I would rather be fishing.
- I drive in the nude.
- I hope you’re as fast on the break as i am.
- I miss Pluto.
- I break for zombies.
- Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
- Honk if my kid falls out.
- The closer you get the slower i drive.
- I’m not speeding I’m qualifying.
- One by one the penguins steal my sanity.
- Don’t make me release the flying monkeys.
- What if the Hokey Kokey really is what its all about?
- Come to the dark side, we have cookies.
- One bad relationship away from being the crazy cat lady.
- Annoy a conservative, think. Care. seek peace.
- Frodo failed, Bush has the ring.
- I’m only speeding because i have to poop.
- Annoyed my immigrants? tell it to the Indians.
- The more people i meet, the more i talk to my dog.
- Caution driver has one eye.
- Whats got 2 thumbs and cant drive worth a damn?
- The best things in life are bees.
- Sarcasm, just another of the services i offer.
- Damn it, hes using the Chewbacca defense.
- Whiskey and night driving, a winning combination.
- In god we trust, all others must pay cash.
- I drive the speed limit, if you don’t like it, call a cop.
- Snakes on a car.
- I only drive badly on weekdays and weekends.
- you’re entitled to your wrong opinion.
- Jesus is coming, look busy.
- This is not an abandoned vehicle.
- Defecate yourself.
- Vote for Voldemort.
- Its OK, I’m trained to drive like a maniac.
- I’m an instrument god uses to annoy you.
- I was sent here to lead by example.
- Don’t follow my lead if the lights change color.
- Retired, i was tired yesterday, and I’m tired again today.
- If only closed minds came with closed mouths.
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