You’re at a fancy restaurant. You have ordered an excellent meal. However, your service is very slow and not very reliable.. Here are ten tips that you can give to your waitress:

1. You need to move quicker. You walk like a tortoise. Also, you need to get out of your shell.
2. You may be tired, but you need to service our table. We have waited thirty minutes for you to return with our meal. All you have delivered to us is this little glass of water.
3. You need to get a complete facial makeover. By the way, that tattoo of a hairy gorilla on your right arm looks ridiculous.
4. You need to take a first aid course. The food that you are serving us tonight is so bad that even our pet dog Benjamin would have a hard to eating it.
5. Do you have earitist? Earitist is the over reliance of cell phones. Your ears will soon look like Dumbos.
6. Are you my waitress? I’ve waited so long for my meal that I’ve decided to grow a beard.
7. I’m not really upset that you spilled some water on my lap. However, spilling gravy on my lap is a different story.
8. Are those your real nails? I haven’t seen such long nails since the 60’s.
9. Please be careful. Your makeup is starting run into my tomato soup.
10. Why does our food match the color of your bleach blonde hair?