You really don’t want the job anyway. This is a simple, yet powerful list of strategies that you can follow to blow that job interview in the first minute. Good luck.

Be late. When the manager comes into the office lobby or waiting area to find you, don’t be there. Be stuck in traffic or worse yet still in bed. This will blow the interview for you immediately.

Be unprofessional dressed. Be dressed like you slept in your suit and just got out of bed. This can blow the interview as soon as the decision maker looks at you.

Have a limp fish handshake. When the interviewer extends their hand to shake yours, present your hand as though it were a dead fish. A limp and weak handshake will leave an immediate negative impression.

Don’t look your interviewer in the eye. Pretend like there is somebody right behind them when they are speaking to you and make eye contact with that imaginary person.

Get a cell phone call during the interview. Put your phone on the most comic-like ring tone and make sure it rings during the interview. Interviewers appreciate it when their well-planned interview is interrupted by “La Cucuracha” coming from your phone.

Sit immediately upon entering the interview’s office. As soon as you get into the office, just sit in the first chair. Don’t wait for an invitation to be seated, just sit down immediately. This shows that you are focused about your relaxation.

Slouch when you are sitting. Make sure that your back is not straight and that your shoulders are hunched forward to show lack of confidence and disinterest.

Complain a lot. Complain about former co-workers, managers, and former clients too. Being extremely negative shows the interviewer that you are a person of discerning character.

Look disinterested. Pretend that you are bored and really don’t want the job. The interviewer will be so impressed with your lack of enthusiasm that they may offer you a signing bonus.

Don’t pay attention. By not paying attention, you force the interviewer to repeat questions. This keeps them alert and focused.

Remember, if you apply yourself and follow these simple rules, you too can blow your job interview in the first minute.