You have realized your life’s ambition and achieved celebrity status. Congratulations! But what should you do now? How should you live your life to maximize the benefits of your new celebrity lifestyle?

The following tips have been tried and tested by many celebrities before you, and will ensure you a high profile life for many years to come.

1. Write your autobiography - The first thing you should do on attaining celebrity status is write your autobiography. Don’t let the fact that you haven’t done very much put you off. Your new public want to get to know the real you.

2. Endorse expensive products - Everybody likes to receive free things, and your new celebrity status will make obtaining freebies very easy. Attach your name to a few expensive items and you’ll soon have them delivered to your door.

3. Read more in Celebrity

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   Do or say something stupid or offensive - Nothing grabs the headlines faster than a celebrity making a fool of themselves. The public can be very forgiving, however, and so a quick, humble apology will soon enhance your reputation.

4. Join a religion - To show the public your spiritual side you need to find the right religion. But remember, mainstream religions are for ordinary people. As a celebrity you need to find an exclusive cult.

5. Make a record - Your celebrity status shows that you are capable of anything, so it should not be difficult to find a recording contract and a guarantee of success. (Note: If you became a celebrity after winning a television talent show then you will already have your first number one based solely on your natural ability. Try starring in a film instead.)

6. Write a second autobiography - You should now have enough material to fill a second volume of your autobiography. If you find you are struggling to pad it out, just fill it with lots of photographs of you and your new, expensive freebies.

7. Invite a celebrity gossip magazine to your home - Another way of showing the public the real you is to invite one of the leading celebrity gossip magazines to interview you in your home. There will be plenty of competition so you can charge a substantial fee. Make sure that the photographs they take show off your expensive belongings.

8. Complain about lack of privacy - One of the problems of being a leading celebrity is the constant media attention. Complain to the newspapers about invasions of your privacy.

9. Appear on a celebrity reality show - In order to increase your profile agree to appear on a celebrity reality television show. The 24 hour coverage will allow the public to see who you really are and combat the incorrect image the media have created.

10. Be seen with your new celebrity friends - Reality television is a great place to make new celebrity friends. Being seen out and about with your new best buddies can increase your media profile.

11. Moan about other celebrities - Are your new celebrity friends using your fame just to raise their own profiles? Make sure everybody knows about their underhand schemes before they ruin your reputation. Don’t allow anyone to leech off your success.

12. Get married - Everybody loves a high profile celebrity wedding. For maximum impact your new spouse should be another celebrity, preferably one you met on a reality television show. Ensure that your wedding photographs are of the highest quality by having them taken by a highly qualified photographer. Your favourite celebrity gossip magazine should be able to find someone with the relevant experience.

13. Adopt a child or two - Show your caring side by including children in your life. As a busy celebrity you may not have room in your schedule to take time out for a pregnancy, so adopt a child or two. These useful celebrity accessories can be picked up in many Third World countries.

14. Get divorced - It can be difficult to maintain a working relationship under the constant glare of the media spotlight. Make a divorce work to your advantage by emphasizing your spouse’s irrational behaviour. Be sure that the public know how traumatised you are.

15. Do or say something stupid or offensive - Nothing grabs the headlines faster than a celebrity making a fool of themselves. The public will understand your vulnerable post-divorce state and forgive you without the need for an apology. If they don’t, remember you’re a celebrity and can do what you like.

16. Go on holiday - Get away from the pressures of celebrity life by travelling abroad on holiday. Don’t worry about causing an incident if you have to force your way through groups of reporters or photographers; the media coverage will keep you in the minds of the public until you return. Deal with any awkward check-in staff with the phrase “Do you know who I am?”

17. Appear on a television chat show - Explain your side of any negative media stories by appearing on a television chat show with a friendly host. The free drinks available before the show will help to make your performance entertaining.

18. Enter rehab - If the celebrity life becomes too much to handle take a rest for a while by going into rehab. This cleansing break will let you recharge your batteries and bring you sympathy and support from your adoring public.

19. Get married again - Everybody loves a high profile celebrity wedding, and a second wedding is no different. For maximum impact, marry your ex.

20. Plan your time effectively - Following all of these tips may seem like a little too much work, but there are things you can do to be more efficient. For instance, you can save time on tips 1 and 6 by finding someone to ghostwrite your autobiography. Also, to avoid any tiresome administration and organisation, get your entourage involved. Even a celebrity needs a good work-life balance.

The celebrity life is a roller coaster ride of highs and lows. By following the tips above you will be able to make the most of the thrilling journey.