The American walks up to the bar and orders a Guinness and noticed that the old man was upset over something he was just sitting there drinking whiskey. As the bar man finished off the pint of Guinness and handed it to the American, the American asked was the old man alright. The bar man replied who “Frankie” the American nodded as if to stay quiet. The bar man replied “ah there is something bothering him for sure he’s not usually like this. I’ll ask him“. So the bar man poured a whiskey into a glass and walked towards Frankie with it saying “Jesus Frankie you don’t look the best is everything okay, here is a whiskey on me”, Frankie said as he rose his head and looked around the bar “I’m not” he said “I’m 75 years old and never in my life have I felt so sad”

” I’ve lost my best friend, I buried him myself this morning” The American said “that is terrible news its always better to talk about these things” Frankie said “eh sure I’m broken” The American slid up the bar to hear the old man a bit clearer and asked the bar man for another whiskey for Frankie.

“Ah its terrible what I’m after doing, I’ve killed him, I’ve killed him never in my life have I felt so sad” The American kind of leans back a bit as if to look at him in disbelief. The bar man starts laughing at Frankie, Frankie pulls back his coat as if it was annoying him and he looks up at the bar man again pushes the empty glass towards the bar man. The American looks at the frail old man and says to the bar man fill it for him on me.

The American says to Frankie “how could you kill a man at your age, let alone burry him then afterwards, your just an old man. Frankie says “it wasn’t a man it was my dear old dog Rock, I’ve had him since my wife died a couple of years back, he’s never done a thing wrong until yesterday, he’s usually a great dog, I don’t know what came over him”.

“What has he done” asked the American. ” ah sure I was in the garden this morning and a farmer came up to me with a dead lamb in his arms, see what your dog is after doing I had to chase him away, I shot at him but he took off”. The farmer said, he continued “you are going to have to put him down I’m sorry Frankie, I know how much you love the dog but he has to go” Frankie agreed.

Get this man another whiskey the American said, Frankie continued his story….. ” the farmer offered to shoot him for me but I didn’t want him to, I said I’ll do it my self. I spent an hour this morning digging the hole in the back garden as the dog watched me doing it, tears were filling up my eyes as the dog sat there as i dug the hole” he swallowed his whiskey and carried on with the story. At this stage everyone in the bar was hanging on every word that Frankie said.

“As I finished the hole I looked around for Rock, he was down taking a drink at the back door of the house, I called him up” “Here Rock” “as he came up to me tail wagging head high as he always did, a very obedient dog, happy in himself, oblivious to what was about to happen. I looked down at him and said, your a good dog but you are terribly stupid, I told you not to go in the fields, you usually don’t, I cant understand why you did this time, and I’m really sorry for this Rock”.

Every ones eyes in the bar filled up with tears wondering what was going to happen next. The American took this opportunity to order them another round for the bar man Frankie and himself. Frankie carried on with his story…. “as I said farewell to my dog I raised the shovel and struck him on the side of the head, he yelped and tore down the garden and hid among the rhubarb leaves. I could here him crying as he tried to lick his wounds, I felt so bad I wished I never got a dog, when I heard the yelping stop”, He called him up again, “here Rock, here dog, here boy” “he came up to me as he did before head raised and proud only this time he was covered in blood, he came up and stood beside the hole looking up at me as if to ask why.”

Frankie wiped his eyes and picked up his whiskey and swallowed it. The American asked Frankie are you okay you don’t have to finish. Frankie said “no i have to” “I took a deep breath and swung for the poor dog again and hit him on the other side of the head, as the dog yelped again, I jumped and he ran screaming down the garden again hiding in the same place as before under the rhubarb leaves.”

” I looked down the garden, I felt so bad that I said to myself you are a dreadful man how could you do this to your own dog, I called him again, here rock, he wouldn’t come this time. I could still here him whimpering in the leaves, I knew he wouldn’t come to me this time because of what I’ve done. I knew I would have to go down and finish what I started. When I got down there he was lying in the leaves bleeding from the head, he was loosing a lot of blood but was still alive. I took another deep breath and swung as hard as my old body could but he yelped so I kept swinging and he kept screaming, there was blood all over the shovel the rhubarb leaves and all over my clothes and I just kept swinging”

Everyone in the bar were shocked at what they were hearing some of them had to leave the bar in floods of tears where they couldn’t take anymore. The American interrupted Frankie ” for fuck sake Frankie could you just not shoot the poor dog” “I could” said Frankie “Only I didn’t have a gun and come to think of it I didn’t have a dog either”

This is only funny because its a true story the old man just tells lies for people to buy him drink.