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10 Reasons Not to Get Married

Published by Ameria Tomezan in Relationship
July 30th, 2008

A list of reasons for you not to be married, ever.

  1. Your dad just ran away with your bride, and now you and your mom are going to share the collective wedding refunds…
  2. You don’t really care much about her leaving, but so many things to get refunds for…..heh….
  3. The flower arrangements were the best part of the wedding for the bride, and she looks like she might run away now.
  4. Your sister’s kids vandalized the flower arrangements after being locked in the storage tent by your bride.
  5. Brown nosing for your wedding presents practically becomes a way of life…
  6. Your mother-in-law will be moving in shortly…she went easy on you while you guys so that she could brag to her friends about her kid being married.
  7. Your bride’s dress is beautiful…but it cost $6987.78….and she won’t wear it to your (private) anniversary party….
  8. Your mother’s mysterious death is bound to be directly or indirectly related to her comments on mysterious noises being heard whilst getting beauty rest at the hotel…(her room shares a wall with yours….)
  9. Someone is guaranteed to get piss drunk at your reception, be it 10 PM or 10 AM….
  10. Your groom’s tux has a cummerbund, and you specifically ordered him a simple vest and jacket combo…

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4 Comments
  1. Andrea
    Posted July 30, 2008 at 9:59 am

    Wow…this is dead on….my groom was flirting with my mom though….but I did have to lock my nieces and nephews in the coat closet….

  2. Tammie
    Posted July 31, 2008 at 6:46 pm

    This is hilarious…I went to my cousin’s reception, and sure enough, my uncle got staggering drunk….I was so embarrassed that I acted like he was just my cousin’s dad and we were just friends…yeuchhh…

  3. Melissa
    Posted July 31, 2008 at 7:25 pm

    That part about flirting is really true…and hilarious. My brother and I had to plan our mom’s wedding to our stepfather. My brother’s husband was fliting with our stepdad, as a joke….he didn’t find it funny…at all…to say the least…

  4. Joan
    Posted August 2, 2008 at 7:58 pm

    I was married a long time ago..a really long time ago, but really though, I never had any problems exept that some drink came in off the street, saw me in my wedding gown, and claimed to be my groom.It was huiliating to say the least.

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