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That’s Enough to Strangle a Horse
These are some old jokes I found funny, I hope they will make you giggle or at least give you a snicker.
Image via Wikipedia
- Do you serve crabs in this restaurant?
We serve everyone sir, take a seat.
- Fat woman: Officer, can you see me across the street?
Officer: Madame, I can see you a mile away.
- Don’t you know the Queen’s English?
Of course I do, and so’s the King.
- 4.Can I have your daughter for my wife?
Well, bring your wife around and we’ll see.
- Me, drunk? I’ve only had tee martoonies.
photo by author
- Customer: Does this dog have a pedigree?
Pet owner: Look, If this dog could talk, he wouldn’t speak to either of us.
- That’s a strange pair of shoes you’re wearing, one black and one white. They must be unique.
Not at all, I have another pair at home just like them.
May I try on that dress in the window?
Well, we’d prefer it if you used the dressing room.
- Can you stand on your head?
No, it’s too high.
- Your sister is spoiled, isn’t she?
Not at all, that’s just the perfume she’s wearing.
- Did you wake up grumpy this morning?
No, I let him sleep late.
photo by author
- You’ve got your shoes on the wrong feet.
I know, I must have had my legs crossed when I put them on.
- How do you get down from an elephant?
You don’t . You get down from a swan.
- Do you know it takes three sheep to make a sweater?
I didn’t even know they could knit.
http://socyberty.com/folklore/a-jack-pot-of-old-folk-sayings/
http://socyberty.com/subcultures/more-old-folk-sayings-we-are-losing/
http://purpleslinky.com/trivia/random/trivial-facts-you-might-want-to-know/
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40 Comments
LOL!
Excellent!..very interesting read and very funny too..Thanks for sharing this great humor piece..Keep it up sis Ruby..I LIKED it..Cheers
This was a fun post until Windows 8 said it could not display this page. I wish I had never down loaded 8. I’m beginning to have less fun on the computer.
Hi Ruby,
Thanks for the humor. I had my first cup of coffee with a few chuckles, it was the best.
Haha, some of these are absolute hilarity. I loved the Queen’s English one because it is typically British humour. Nice work…a really good collection.
Haha..these are really STRANGE…but I’d had an entertainment here..thanks for the stress relieve here..of course, as usual, have my liked it.
Hey Ruby!
I think you should be responsible for a daily lol here.
These made me do that.
Thanks for the nice start to my day!
The old ones are the best!!
Made me smile nice work!
I loved it.
I sure had a hearty laugh.
This is hilarious, especially the one about the shoes on the wrong feet. good creative ideas.
Very funny!
Thanks you friends, your support is wonderful. I don’t know what I would do without you.
Friends, the picture with the mouse is one I snapped at a pet store near us, and I won’t tell you who the feet belong to.
Thanks for giving some lighter moments
made me smile , thanks
Love the photo of the sign!
Nice.
Thanks for some good laughs Ruby!
A few cute ones in there
lol…those were actully pretty funny
ha!! those are hilarious
Great jokes 
nice!
Nice, joyful post. Thanks for my laugh.
You made me laugh Ruby, thanks!
hillarioous piece ruby. Who would want to try-the-dress-in-th-window? keep it coming.
There are some good ones there, Ruby. Thanks for sharing.
Some of these were pretty funny. Some of them made me think of my brother-in-law.
Some good ones Ruby.
RJ
That is funny.
LOL A few of these defeniatly made me laugh but….I’m not sure I get the elephant/swan one….hmmmmm lol
No horses were harmed in the making of this link!!!
the sign about kids left in stores cracked me right up!
The old ones can still be the best!
Cracking up over here! Those were good for sure.
These jokes were pretty funny, Ruby! I certainly did need a laugh today and these jokes did the trick!
Ruby, you put these together quite well. I got a smile out of them.
I like the sign in the window too. Fun!
Funny!