This sounds very complicated, and has taken years to perfect, but just follow this simple three step process and you will be running along the path of enlightenment in no-time. Just forge a knife made entirely of glass, dip it in a pot of melted wood, and slide it through the air. If this works properly, there will be a giant hole in the air to jump through and you will be free of all hassles and worries in the world. Actually, you will be free of the world all together.

The first step in this process is making the knife. Since the knife must be completely made of glass, and there aren’t to many glass knives on eBay, you must find a glass center and blow the glass yourself. Just speak with an assistant on how to forge glass. The knife may be any shape, it just must have some form of a handle and a sharp point. Try to make the knife as dense as you can with the smallest air bubble in the middle as possible. When this is finished, flashes of small lightning-like sparks should dance on the top of the knife. This shows that the magic has fully fused with the knife. Pull the knife out of the furnace and wait for it to cool off. Then it’s ready to be dipped in the wood.

Now it’s time to dip the knife in wood. The difficult part about this part of the process isn’t actually dipping the knife in the wood, but getting the wood to melt. You can purchase pre-liquified wood, but it’s easier just to melt the wood yourself. It will take a lot of time, but the reward is well worth it. First, get the right pot. You can choose among a copper pot, a silver pot or a steel pot. Then you need to sketch a picture of a tree on the pot with burnt stick. The stick must be the same kind of wood you’re using to melt and dip the knife. The right wood could be from an elder-wood tree. The right wood could be a sycamore branch. The right wood could be a willow log. The right wood could even be the root of an ash tree. However, the wood must be from a tree, not a bush or other plant. After you have gathered your wood and drawn the tree on the pot, simply soak the wood for 90 minutes and then toss it in the pot. Put the pot on an open fire and let it cook for about 2 and a half weeks. Then simply take the knife and dip the part above the handle into the liquid wood. Now the knife is ready to slice the air.

The third and final step is to cut the air. This may sound easy, but on the contrary, this step is far from it. You can’t just swing the knife right off the bat. You have to choose the right location. It has to be up high somewhere, like on the top of a hill. Once you’re at the right place, clear your mind of everything else going on. Let all your cares in the world drain out of your mind like dirty water after a bath. After this is finished, clearly picture the color green in your mind. Then slowly and deliberately drag the knife through the air in a straight nearly vertical line through the air. There should be a thin black line where the knife cut the air. Now peel the air molecules apart until a giant hole appears. Now jump through and you are free.