When you have to get dress in the dark, trying not to wake your wife, you notice while you are standing in a crowded elevator everyone staring at you. You have on one shoe from two different pairs—one brown the other black. Duh—

You are a young person. You decide you want to start sagging in order to be socially accepted by friends. As you and your buddies are walking and talking all of a sudden everyone strikes out running—realizing it must be serious—you strike out with the group.  After running a while, you look back to see what’s chasing you all and you notice a rather large Pit Bull in serious stride right on your tail. Your adrenaline kicks in and you pick up stride only to come to a dead end. Your only way out is to scale a ten foot high fence. Just as you start to jump, your pants drop to your knees and you trip and fall.  A-woof—woof. Och—och… Mama!