Learning English sometimes is the funniest and most hilarious thing to do. I am always wondering why “eleven” not pronounce as “onety-one”? As in 21, 31…and so forth, we pronounce as “twenty-one, thirty-one…and so forth. You will also come across the English word “set” has more meanings as compared to other words in English. When you spell “Evian” backwards, it will pronounce as “naïve.” The word “Mayday” actually means “help me” in French. It is written as “M’aidez” in French language. The other word, denim, comes from the French word of “de Nimes.” Next, I am curious about the word “colloquy” which is pronounced as “kolo-kwi” but not “kolo-kwu.” Can anyone tell me why? Maybe I have to ask the language expert to find out the answer. Below are my reasons why I think English is the funniest and most hilarious language to learn so far.

English is rich with variety “nutrients”

These flamboyant words have been invented to refer to specific matters. These colorful, expressive and ebullient words have enriched English with a high value of nutrition. These words appear appalling to you, aren’t they? Try to pronounce and say them out as loud as you could make, you will definitely laugh at your belly! Maybe you are not aware that they have been used around the English community quite a while. Here are some of the examples:

• CRAPULENCE: Discomfort from eating or drinking.
• FAFF: To dither or fumble about.
• ARCIPLUVIAN: Many colored, like a rainbow.
• BIBLOBIBULI: People who read so much.
• BOONDOGGLE: An unnecessary or wasteful project.
• NINNYHAMMER: Fool or simpleton.
• COCKALORUM: Absurd, crazy.
• CODOLOGY: Nonsense.
• SESQUIPEDALIAN: Refers to long words.
• BROUHAHA: A noisy argument or commotion.
• CANOODLE: To hug and kiss.
• TATTERDEMALION: A tattered or ragged person
• BALLYHOO: Exaggerated publicity or advertising.
• MUMBLECRUST: A toothless one.
• BAMBOOZLE: Trick or deceive or mislead someone.
• CATAGLOTTISM: Kissing with the tongue. Oooh la la!
• TINTINNABULATION: A ringing or tinkling sound.
• CODSWALLOP: More nonsense!
• FLABBERGASTED: Astonish, agape
• SKULDUGGERY: Dirty work, or it can mean “they’re up to no good!”
• MARITORIOUS: Being fond of one’s husband.
• NESCIENT: Ignorant.
• DANDIPRAT: A silly, little fellow or urchin.
• RAMBUNCTIOUS: Lively, hard to control.
• DISCOMBOBULATED: Thrown into a state of confusion.
• FLUMMOXED: Confused or perplexed.
• GADZOOKS: An exclamation of surprise or annoyance.
• QUISQUILLIOUS: Trashy, worthless
• SNOLLYGOSTER: A shrewd unprincipled person.
• MUNDUNGUS: refuse; rubbish.
• DIDAPPER: One who disappears only to bob up again.
• PARAPHERNALIA: Personal possessions, or miscellaneous articles.
• DOOZY: Something extraordinary or outstanding of its kind.
• SPONDULICKS: Money, cash.
• FLAMBOYANT: Rich in color, flashy
• HUMUNGOUS: Huge, enormous.
• PUCKEROO: Useless, broken.
• MOLLYCODDLE: To treat too protectively.
• JINGOISM: Aggressive or warlike patriotism.
• GOSSOON: A young lad (French word for boy, “garcon”)
• LOLLAPALOOZA: Outstanding.
• MUGWUMP: Someone who stays aloof.
• NINNYHAMMER: Fool or simpleton.
• PANDEMONIUM: Great noise, confusion and disorder.
• ISHKABIBBLE: A dismissive statement.
• GOBBLEDYGOOK: Unintelligible language, especially jargon or bureaucratese.
• HORNSWOGGLE: Cheating. Popeye’s refrain every time Brutus diddled him as “I’s bin hornswoggled!”
• JOBBERNOWL: A stupid person, a blockhead.
• LANGUESCENT: Becoming tired.
• LOLLYGAG: To fool around; to dawdle or dally; to spend time aimlessly.
• OOJAH: A thingamabob, whatchamacallit or doohickey.
• PYKNIC: Short and fat.
• PUSILLANIMOUS: Faint-hearted, timid.

English is packed with very hilarious abbreviations

We use abbreviations to ease our task when explaining particular issue to save time of typing. Do you know that these abbreviations stand for the hilarious words? Here are some examples I found.

• APIS: Any Port In a Storm.
• ASTRO: Always Stating The Really Obvious.
• BANANA: Built Absolutely Nothing Anywhere Near Anyone.
• BHAG: Big, Hairy, Audacious Goal.
• BOOSTER: Balanced, Observed, Objective, Specific, Timely, Enhancing, Relevant.
• CAVEs: Citizens Against Virtually Everything.
• CHAOS: Can’t Have Anyone Over Syndrome.
• CLAWS: Creating Liveable Alternatives to Wage Slavery.
• DRIB: Don’t Read If Busy.
• DUPPIE: A Depressed Urban Professional.
• ESO: Equipment Superior to Operator.
• FIGJAM: Flip I’m Good, Just Ask Me!
• FILO: First In, Last Out.
• FLUF: Fat, Little, Ugly Fellow.
• GAAFOFY: Go Away And Find Out For Yourself.
• GOOMBY: Get Out Of My Back Yard!
• IKIWISI: I’ll Known It When I See It.
• IMHO: In My Humble Opinion.
• IMMLY: Is My Medicine Legal Yet?
• MADD: Mother Against Drunk Drivers.
• NOISE: Netscape, Oracle, IBM, Sun, and Everyone else.
• NOTE: Not Over There, Either.
• NUMBY: Not Under My Back Yard.
• OTPOTSS: Orientation Towards People Of The Same Sex.
• SNAG: Sensitive New Age Guy.
• SODDI Defense: Some Other Dude Did It.
• TEOTWAWKI: The End Of The World As We Know.
• URL: Unable to Readily Locate.

English sounds strange when it is rearrange to form other word or phrase

Try to rearrange the English word or name you came across in another word or phrase, you will surely laugh at your results. To make English sounds funny and hilarious, the word you chose must have at least 10 or more than 10 words. The rearrangement of English alphabets to form new words or a phrase is also called anagram. See my results below:

• President Bush: Burnished Pest.
• Hillary Clinton: Only I Can Thrill.
• The Earthquakes: That Queer Shake.
• The Eyes: They See.
• A Gentleman: Elegant Man.
• Alien Abductions: Tabloid Nuisance.
• Debit Card: Bad Credit.
• Boeing: Big One.
• Mediocrity: Me Cry “Idiot”
• Tony Blair PM: I’m Tory Plan B.
• The Google Search Engine: Oh, Cheer Net-Logging Ease!
• The Enron Corporation: Horror! Note Panic Tone!
• John Winston Howard: Join Harsh Down-town.
• Bangers and Mash: Bad Man Gnashers.
• Stuffed Sardines: Disaster Snuffed.
• Presbyterian: Best In Prayer.
• Prognosis: Signs: Poor.
• Silence of the Lambs: Con Bites Male Flesh.
• Fried Noodles: Defines Drool.
• Software: Swear Oft.
• The Hospital Ambulance: A Cab, I Hustle to Help Man.
• The Intel Corporation: Tailor One Rotten Chip.
• Sweet and Sour Pork: Outspoken Rewards.
• Florence Nightingale: Nigel, Fetch An Iron Leg.
• Eggs and Bacon: Conned Gasbag.
• Greyhound: Hey, Dog, Run!

English name sounds odd when it matches with the occupation

English is indeed fun and interesting to learn. When a person’s name is a cranny match with his or her occupation (which is termed as aptonym in English), you will come across with some hilarious results as follows:

• Will Dunn: Lawyer.
• Jett Black: Hair Stylist.
• Dr. Russell Brain: Neurologist.
• Mr. Horn: Band Teacher.
• Otto Nogo: Mechanic.
• Malcolm Plumb: Plumber.
• Dr. Stopp: Surgeon.
• Bill Bord: Sign Painter.
• Scott Constable: Police Officer.
• Doctor D’Eath: Surgeon.
• Cliff Hanger: Serial Writer.
• Polly Glott: Translator.
• Creflo A.Dollar: T.V. Evangelist.
• Doolittle & Dalley: Real estate Agents.
• Claire Jewell: Gemmologist.
• Harcourt Champion: Wimbledon Pro.
• Philip McCavity: Dentist.
• Ava Ball: Wedding Planner.
• Leonard Divine: Rabbi.
• Henrietta Wilde: Zoologist.
• Dr. Richard Tapper: Urologist.

English is full of words for COLORs

Do you aware that English is a beautiful language? It contains many words for colors. Have you had any troubles to understand such words? Look up the dictionary, and you may observe substantial amounts of words which are initiated with COLORs. Do you know the meaning of these words? Here are some examples I would like to share with you.

• Yellow-belly: coward.
• Yellow ribbon: sign of support for soldiers at the front.
• White list: contains favored items
• White lie: a small fib.
• Yellow Journalism: irresponsible and alarmist reportage.
• Whiteout: loss of visibility in a snow blizzard.
• Red-handed: caught in the act.
• Red flag: danger or caution.
• Purple Heart: US military decoration.
• Greenback: US dollar bill.
• White as a sheet: to be very pale.
• White Elephant: something that doesn’t fit in.
• Bluestocking: the upper class woman.
• Blue blood: royal, regal.
• Black and blue: bruised.
• Black hearted: evil.
• Bluenose: a strictly puritanical person.
• Bluebook: list of socially prominent people.
• Black tie: formal.
• Black sheep: the outcast
• Blackout: loss of electricity.
• Black humor: rather dark comedy.
• Red tape: bureaucracy.
• Purple speech: profane Talk.
• Bluestone: grey sandstone used for building.

English has an awesome collection of words to express fear towards something

Wow, English is great! It has a long list that describes almost anything you scared of. There are many things we scared of in our life. These words are all ending in -phobia in English. Here are just some examples to share with you.

• Arachnophobia: scared of spider.
• Tachophobia: scared of speed.
• Taeniophobia: scared of tapeworms.
• Cacophobia: scared of ugliness.
• Ablutophobia: scared of washing.
• Ceraunophobia: scared of thunder.
• Scolionophobia: scared of going to school.
• Hierophobia: fear towards sacred things and priests.
• Social Phobia: fear of being evaluated negatively in social situations.
• Dendrophobia: scared of trees.
• Bufonophobia: sacred of toads.
• Porphyrophobia: scared of purple color.
• Sophophobia: scared of learning.
• Lyssophobia: fear of being mad.
• Numerophobia: scared of numbers.
• Belonephobia: scared of pins and needles.
• Trypanophobia: scared of injections.
• Thanatophobia: scared of dying or death.
• Zoophobia: scared of animals.
• Aclurophobia: scared of cats.
• Phagophobia: scared of eating and swallowing.
• Philemaphobia: scared of being kissed.
• Catoptrophobia: scared of mirrors.
• Octophobia: scared of number 8.
• Graphophobia: scared of writing.
• Verbophobia: scared of words.
• Ergophobia: scared of work.
• Rhytiphobia: fear of getting wrinkles.

One English word can split into two English words

Lewis Carroll in “Alice Through the Looking Glass” wrote that, “…there are two meanings packed up into one word.” This means one English word is a mixture of two English words to form another new English word. It is termed as Portmanteaux (In French, it means suitcase). See the results I found below:

• Fantabulous: fantastic + fabulous
• Gaydar: gay + radar
• Hairagami: origami + hair
• Bacne: back + acne
• Spork: spoon + fork
• Tangelo: tangerine + pomelo
• Oxbridge: Oxford + Cambridge
• Mimbo: male + bimbo
• Wonkavator: Wonka + elevator
• Plucot: Plum + apricot
• Sexcellent: Sex + excellent
• Shemale: she + male
• Moped: motor + pedal
• Mutagen: mutation + genesis
• Texican: Texan + Mexican
• Wonderosity: wonder + curiosity
• Skort: skirt + short
• McJob: McDonalds + job
• Carboloy: carbon + alloy
• Robocop: robotic + cop
• Pretendo: pretend + Nintendo
• Cocacolanisation: Coca-Cola + colonization
• Avionics: aviation + electronics
• Brunch: breakfast + lunch
• Ghettro: ghetto + retro
• Infomercial: information + commercial
• Hugantic: huge + gigantic
• Lupper: lunch + supper
• Digipeater: digital + repeater
• Fanzine: fan + magazine
• Cyborg: cybernetic + organism
• Twigloo: twig + igloo
• Vanbulance: van + ambulance
• Phoneme: phonetics + scheme
• Pomato: potato + tomato

Some hilarious but interesting English sayings by the famous people

You may have come across with some hilarious but interesting English sayings by the famous people you familiar with. This group of people can be those who are writers, poets, dancers, actors, actresses, entrepreneurs, composers, presidents, kings and so forth. Here are some examples:

• I die hard but am not afraid to go. (George Washington, former US President, December 14, 1799)
• Either that wallpaper goes, or I do. (Oscar Wilde, writer, November 30, 1900)
• Woe is me. Methinks I’m turning into a god. (Vespasian, Roman Emperor, 79 AD)
• They couldn’t hit an elephant at this disc… (General John Sedgwick, Union Commander, 1864)
• I am a Queen, but I have not the power to move my arm. (Louise, Queen of Prussia, 1820)
• I knew it. I knew it. Born in a hotel room – and God damn it – died in a hotel room. (Eugene O’Neill, writer, November 27, 1953)
• Put out the light. (Theodore Roosevelt, former US President, 1919)
• Sister, you’re trying to keep me alive as an old curiosity, but I’m done, I’m finished, I’m going to die. (George Bernard Shaw, playwright, November 2, 1950)
• I must go in, the fog is rising. (Emily Dickinson, poet, 1886)
• Die? I should say not, dear fellow. No Barrymore would allow such a conventional thing to happen to him. (John Barrymore, actor, May 29, 1942)
• Go on, get out – last words are for fools who haven’t said enough. (Karl Marx, revolutionary, 1883)

English words are relatively long

Some English words are relatively long in their length. The longest word has a length of over 1,000 alphabets as documented in my article The Most Horrible English Words.

English is a pot pourri

English is a pot pourri as it is a mixture of Latin, French and other foreign derived words. Indeed, English is not pure English in its nature as it shows an obvious characterization of a linguistic multiculturalism. The influence of other languages upon English has been covered in my articles Modern English is Not 100% English and Modern English is Not 100% English 2.

English has your tongue twisted

And you thought your pronunciation is good? Try on to pronounce the sentences below; you sure will have your tongue twisted. It is not only hard to articulate but also send your tongue tugging, tripping and twirling tentatively. Here are some examples:

Larry Harley, a burly squirrel hurler, hurled a furry squirrel through a curly grill.

I thought a thought.

But the thought I thought wasn’t

the thought I thought I thought.

If the thought I thought I thought

had seen the thought I thought,

I wouldn’t have thought so much.

A gazillion gigantic grapes gushed

Gradually giving gosphers gooey guts.

The seething seas ceaseth

And twiceth the seething seas sufficeth us.

Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.

If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers,

Where’s the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?

Moses supposes his toeses are roses,

but Moses supposes erroneously.

For Moses, he supposes his toeses aren’t roses,

as Moses supposes his toeses to be.

Brisk brave brigadiers brandished broad bright blades,

Blunderbusses, and bludgeons balancing them badly.

You’ve no need to light a night-light

On a light night like tonight,

For a night-light’s light’s a slight light,

And tonight’s a night that’s light.

When a night’s light, like tonight’s light,

It is really not quite right

To light night-lights with their slight lights

On a light night like tonight.

Can you imagine an imaginary menagerie manager imagining

managing an imaginary menagerie?

Hilarious idioms in English

English is sometimes expressed in a phrase or expression with meanings different from the literal interpretation of the words. It makes people wondering to explore its meanings behind the phrases. Here are some examples:

• Break a leg: do well, or a wish of good luck.
• Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth: don’t look for fault in a gift.
• Cold turkey: to give up something abruptly without any substitutes.
• Long in the tooth: to be getting old.
• Let the cat out of the bag: to divulge a secret.
• Jump on the bandwagon: follow the mob, or do what everybody else is doing.
• Crocodile tears: phony tears
• Cut from the same cloth: to appear or behave in the same way.
• Blow off some steam: to relax or lessen the tension.

English uses almost every alphabet in one sentence

It is unbelievable to find that almost every letter of the alphabet is used in one sentence. The letter may appear at least once or more. This is called pangram in English. Here are some examples:

• Jumpy zebra vows to quit thinking coldly of sex.
• Perhaps President Clinton’s amazing sax skills will be judged quite favorably.
• The risqué gown marked a very brazen exposure of juicy flesh.
• Cozy sphinx waves quart jug of bad milk.
• The public was amazed to view the quickness and dexterity of the juggler.

English is accommodated with lots of “echo words”

Well, you do not have to shout loudly in the valley to hear the echo sound. It has been designed in English to give you a sensation of echo to your hearing. These English words will definitely serve you a bit of a chuckle. Here are some examples:

• Riff-raff
• Tohu-bohu
• Toowit toowoo
• Rat-tat-tat
• Pishery-pashery
• Jiggery-pokery
• Knick-knack
• Whipper-snipper
• Omnium gatherum
• Hootchi-coochi
• Gibble-gabble
• Dipphy-hippy
• Fender-bender
• Arsey-versey
• Dilly-dally
• Boogie-woogie
• Cheeky chappie
• Fiff-faff
• Fuzzy wuzzy
• Hullaballoo
• Hunky dorey
• Fee fi fo fum
• Higgledy-piggledy
• Wishy-washy

Where to put punctuations?

Try challenging yourself to put punctuations for the sentence given below. If you know where to insert the punctuation for this sentence, you have succeeded to solve this clue with your intelligence. Isn’t it fun and interesting to learn English?

Mr Malcom had had had had while Mrs Baltimore had had had had had had had the headmaster s approval

No matter how you read, it’s the same!

Try reading on the sentences. No matter how you read, whether you read it forwards or backwards, it’s the same as the initial words you have read. This is called palindromes in English. Aren’t they interesting and hilarious? Here are some examples:

• Do geese see God?
• Go deliver a dare, vile dog.
• Lay a wallaby baby ball away, Al.
• Pull up if I pull up.
• Now, Sir, a war is won!
• Rae! Bite you no yeti bear!
• Slap a ham on Omaha, pals.
• So, Mama, I won – now I am Amos!
• Star comedy by Democrats.
• Panic is Titanic? I nap.
• Mom’s Dad & Dad’s Mom!

Well, now try challenging yourself to read the text below from left to right, and later from right to left. What’s your result? You’ll find the word is the same either you read it backwards or forwards. Next, you invert the text and try to read the word upside down and backwards. What’s your finding? It is indeed interesting and yet hilarious, isn’t it?

Don’t nod

Dogma: I am Gog

Never odd or even

Too bad – I hid a boot

Rats live on no evil star

No trace; not one carton

Was it Eliot’s toilet I saw?

Murder for a jar of red rum

May a moody baby doom a yam?

Go hang a salami; I’m a lasagna hog!

Satan, oscillate my metallic sonatas!

A Toyota! Race fast – safe car: a Toyota

Straw? No, too stupid a fad; I put soot on warts

Are we not drawn onward, we few, drawn onward to new era?

Doc note: I dissent. A fast never prevents a fatness. I diet on cod

No, it never propagates if I set a gap or prevention

Anne, I vote more cars race Rome to Vienna

Sums are not set as a test on Erasmus

Kay, a red nude, peeped under a yak

Some men interpret nine memos

Campus motto: Bottoms up, Mac

Go deliver a dare, vile dog!

Madam, in Eden I’m Adam

Oozy rat in a sanitary zoo

Ah, Satan sees Natasha

Lisa Bonet ate no basil

Do geese see God?

God saw I was dog

Dennis sinned